No Bellman, I don’t cry.

Being poor makes me desire to have more.
And when I do, I feel even bluer.

Possessions way me down.
And so does playing this game round and round.

I’m broke but wear a nice suit and drive a nice car.
Close but no cigar.

I rent a small apartment although
I imagine I can buy every house in my neighborhood,
And if I would?

I give away all my things except two bags.
I see good people in faraway places
Exotic lands and beautiful faces
Yet I long for what I don’t have.

The government and my family pay for all my things.
I don’t feel free
Knowing they can pull my strings.

And there hasn’t ever been a recipe
Or a path that lets me be me

Possesions or no possessions, I alternate
And I never found that perfect state.

I have no wise words to share now.
No magic formula; I don’t know how.

Maybe Bob all along was right
Love myself and fight the good fight
And everything’s gonna be alright.

Anything is Possible

I believe anything is possible. 

So I believe that you can believe anything is possible too,

And you can believe in me.

And if we believe in each other,

Then together we can achieve anything. 

We All Have Good Reasons

I say I have a good reason to keep the money

I say I want to help the world

That I’m doing it for them not me

I say it again and convince myself I’m good

I say it enough that I really believe I would

But it’s not for them

I do it all for me

I want to be great

And set myself free

If I am smarter than the rest

If I make everybody notice

If I have more of all the best

If only I can be more than this

Then I think I can love myself

Then it will be okay

But it won’t.

I won’t

It’s a lie

I can just love myself now

Not anything to prove

I am worthy of love

I deserve the truth

Cherry Blossom Life

It's a little fuzzy, this road of life.
Not knowing what's beyond the turn.
But I know where I've come from.
How I've struggled and been burnt.

I can see how delicate you are perfectly.
I touch you and feel your presence inside of me.
I couldn't imagine this more beautifully.
This sweet passing moment with you.
It's all I need.

Big Choices

I was young then,

Just a boy going to school

It happened to be around the block

It was cold in the mornings

My mother told me I had to walk

Every morning I went to the classroom labeled 1b

There was a teacher I didn't know and like

It was the classroom assigned to me

I ate the food my mother cooked every night

Woke up in the morning when she said it was time

I had the same hobbies as my older brother

All of which were encouraged by my father

Finally I found a way to be different

Dying for individuality by middle school

I started being bad and acting the fool

There was no good outlet for me to see me

Nor did another show me how to really be

Molded into the struggling young man

Pressure from school, family, and friends

But that is not who I wanted to be

Desperate to escape

Desperate to feel free

16, I got a car and could drive anywhere

I thought the open road would make me cool

Except that I didn't have money for entertainment or fuel

And just a few hours before my curfew time

I stayed out late to get really high

But it wasn't much of a choice

More of the cheapest way to escape

Trying to run away from a world

One I was born into and didn't make

But real men don’t run away

They take what they have been given

They use it to work

They use it to fight their way

But I still wasn't the real me

In my craziness I wouldn't feel anything

Needing a friend to show me a real something

My brain half blunted

I didn't really want to be buried

It felt good for a while

I just wanted to disappear in style

I sobered up and went back to school

Nobody was forcing me

Just another thing I was expected to do

My first real choice was to choose my major

I chose my classes, the places, and times of day

I chose when to study

I chose not to play

I started to date

I liked to think I had my way

But really most of the time they choose me

They weren't many and I wasn't picky

I changed to a different major

Refocusing on my studies and my future

I learned more about myself and the world

Knowledge was the eraser erasing my blur

I moved into Stout Hall, the old cheap dormitory

A pinch of rebels, addicts, outcasts, and freaks

I added to the crew and joined the …… community

Was it time for my first big decision?

Making it after college graduation

I didn't slave to another for an easy buck

I went to the end of the world, a place far off

Everyone told me not to go

It was exactly what I needed to work, play, and grow

Poor little village from first world city

Giving time to others with no money

It was a great adventure and best part of my life

Even the moments I hated then, I look back and love

Learned good and more bad about what I was made of

I wanted the adventure to never end

Went to more countries teaching English

It would seem as if my career began

My job wasn't much more than conversational prostitution

Years rolled by and I became a professor

My loans were all paid, no need for a longer stay

I could go anywhere and live and play

I continue on working my passion on the side

I study, read, and write looking for my idea

I think, sit, and scribble about my mission

My contribution is to help my brother’s fruition

I work best with this goal in my mind

Testing myself while I strive

I became a man. 

It means picking my cause and giving my everything

I make sacrifices, lose friends and say goodbye to lovers

It is terrible but eventually I will gain others

As a child I was a passive observer of a life happening to me

As an adult I am happening to my community

To be a man my big choice is my path of life

Back on Eden

In the air the angels play the songs from an age of awe

The lyrics are written as great art making the wall

He whispers soft words and peace flows from his lips.

She gently strolls down the path as harmony rolls off her hips.

In a place filled with consciousness and peaceful absolutes.

In their mouths they taste the juice of the sanctified fruits. 

The fruits glisten as pure water gives them their richness

Young lovers taste in it innocence and original sweetness

                                   

The fruit’s bodies are as strong as the sunlight from which they grow. 

It is their life, the only thing they know. 

  

God gave us Eden and we fell.

If we get back to Eden, will we dissolve from this hell?

I want to know.... you soulmate

I want to know…..

Can you see behind closed eyes?

Giving you faith in the other side?

Can you hear the soul whisper?

About the win to the infinite power?

Can you teach a lost soul how to be found?

Dance a holy dance on a sacred ground?

Can you move slow?

Make your voice sing low?

Is your love still alive?

Or is lost deep inside?

Can you find peace in the obscene?

And listen to the deepest meaning?

Do you guess the end of it all?

And remember before the first fall?

Can you teach me the way?

I seem to have forgot my place.

Do you dance in between the beats?

Building your spirit unto a peak?

Can you control your dreaming?

And hear wisdom in the street screaming?

Are you experienced enough to be wise?

Can you feel the stare of another’s eyes?

Can you meet me in your secret place?

Listen to my silence of nothing more to say?

What is this ball for?

There is a ball in most of the popular games.

A basketball, baseball, tennis ball, football, soccer ball, and rugby ball.

In a match everyone can see them.

People use them to score points and beat the other team.

There is another ball, one that is often in dreams.

It looks like a door handle, a balloon, or a button on the wall.

In a dream, it is a veil.

It is a person’s soul and it can be used it to see one self.

A Beautiful Crime

These sweet words that I whisper in your ear.

I don't know where they come from and I really don't care.

I'm not out of control in anger but out of control in love.

When I see you sweet girl, I can't want you enough.

So we sit on the beach drinking red wine.

I gaze in your eyes as your hand falls in mine.

The ocean is smooth mirroring the full moon’s yellow light.

It rests above the horizon glowing pure and bright.

The reflection in the water shows us two moons.

One of them is for me, and the other is for you.

And as the night drifts on the moon settles close to the sea.

Both of the moons draw together, just like you and me.

And finally they touch and are in one another.

In that moment we surrender, coming together.

I am in you and you are around me.

Our boundaries are merging setting us free.

My Life

I was born through the backdoor.

That is why everything is slow to me.

I go deep down to be born again.

That is why I love to sleep.

In that place all my burdens dissolve.

That is why I can see something beautiful.

Yet my memory is taken when I awake.

That is why I go there again searching.

A sweet memory of a faded dream lingering.

At The Bar

I am feeling empty.

I am feeling blue.

I’m going to fill up half on alcohol,

And half on you.

It’s going to be fun

And it’s going to be nice.

And who knows where it will lead

If it all goes right.

But in the morning the euphoria goes,

And and then so do you.

I'm left feeling even more empty

And even more blue.

혼자

(Alone)

진짜 나는기분이 너무 공허해요.
왜냐하면 내가 가진 많은 사랑을 주고싶어요.
그런데 그렇게 못해요.
난 혼자 살아요.
내 아파트에서 혼자.
내 작은 세계에서 혼자.
집에 같이 이야기할수있는 누나 가 없어요.
집에 싸울수있는 형이 없어요.
집에 같이 배울수있는 아버지가 없어요.
집에 고자질할수있는 어머니가 없어요.
그래서 나는 친구를 찾아 세계를 여행하죠.
하지만 다음엔 많은 것이 달라지겠죠.

우리는 다시는 같지 않을 거예요.

Ascended Master to lost child.

If you trust me, the way that I do you,

We will reach the end of the road together.

I try to lead you on the shortest and easiest path,

But not when it leads to destruction.

...

I have the experience and wisdom to love you,

To know when to do something even if it hurts,

So I can watch you grow.

When I can I give you the gift of happiness in care

And watch you rejoice,

These are my proudest days.

...

But I know sometimes you can’t understand why I am this way,

Why I don’t do this or that.

It pains me that the only way I know is this struggle,

But I want you to know that I AM HERE and I love you.

Life is so funny.

I get out of bed at half past 2
I see a new girl is wearing your shoes
She doesn't have a fancy car
Much better at playing the guitar

But it hurts
It stings
It burns
And it bleeds

We could have been great lovers
We could have at least been friends
But you chose to be cold
And then you chose revenge

I turn
I toss
I can't eat
I am lost

She likes them just as much
Or maybe even more than you
This girl who is playing the guitair
And wearing your old shoes

rebounding

There is a young man, mad at the world.
He is drinking alone, sitting on a bar stool.
He waits. The night lingers. He doesn't care.
She glances, smiles, and entices with a stare.
He meets her, loves her, and forgets her.
She loves him and hates him but never knows him.
Tomorrow night both are empty and neither has been heard.
Both have one more reason to be mad at the world.

wakeful dream

Every word blessed with meaning
Every song a poem of being
Every home a painting come to life
Every breath a meditation in light
Every meal arranged as art
Every touch a polished kiss
Every exchange a refined gift
Every dream a magical trip
Every dance and intimate step
I want this purposeful living
And hunger for wakeful existence
Instead I sleepwalk through the day
Ignoring the people to my left and right
And stare at empty faces as I dream in the night

Exit #8

The bright and brilliant rain comes.
The Earth shakes.
And the dove flies away from here.
It disappears into a white fluffy cloud.
And nothing is left here.
No sound, nothing to see, nothing to hear.
Just a memory dissolved away.

m-AN-imal

mANIMAL

My body screams yes.
My spirit answers no.
“PROTEIN, PROTEIN, 

PROTEIN,” she screams!
“MURDER, MURDER, 

MURDER,” the reply.
I wake up every morning a vegetarian.
I go to sleep every night a carnivore.

Little White Snowflake Lies and the Avalanche

Dedicated to Pla "Bangkok Girl"

Well, I thought
I ought.

So, I said
I did.

But, you couldn’t know
I didn’t go.

And, I am untrue
To me and you.

Now, I always lie
Carrying the pain inside.

LOVE was the answer

I asked her where to go.

She said love would guide us.

I asked what I/we should do when I/we get there.

They said love would tell me.

I asked him what the answer to my question was.

He said love was the answer.

I asked him how I could really know.

He told me love would make me sure.

I wondered what I should do next.

I figured I should probably start loving.

Yes, No, Maybe

Yes, You look familiar and yes you look cool. I have traveled all around so sometimes I forget where I have been. Have I ever met you along my way?

No, I wasn’t there but heard it was fine and nice. I will probably go next time. If we cross paths, I will probably see you there.

Maybe, I will be there and maybe I will see you around. Maybe this meeting was just a coincidence but maybe we will be more.

The Revisted Prayer of St. Francis

Where people seek miracles, let me bring marvelous God sends.

Where people seek happiness, let me bring gleeful joy.

Where people seek growth, let me bring escalated development.

Where people seek wisdom, let me bring insightful thinking.

Where people seek spirituality, let me bring sacred holiness.

Where people seek affluence, let me bring abundant prosperity.

Where people seek intention, let me bring direction and guidance.

Where people seek light, let me bring radiant illumination.

Where people seek peace, let me bring tranquil serenity.

Where people seek healing, let me bring holistic therapy.

Where people seek the source, let me channel Jesus Christ.

Where people seek love, let me accept them and care for them.

sixteen days in south korea

Here I rest, taking a break at work
My days are too long and my nights are to short
But it seems to be that things get easier everyday
Especially since I remembered to not treat myself in a mean way

See, I worry about what I am going to eat
I worry about the places my friends should meet
I worry about internet, money, and telephones
I worry about so much, all and one

But when I sit back and take a breath
When I enjoy the breaks that life gives
When I simply just take the time to look around
The possibilities exist for life abound

Such is Life

I sought, I ought
I spoke truth, I lied

I struggled, I fought
I lived, I died

Traveling wide
I learnt it all

But having no guide
Was born to fall

Lying Still

As we lie here, so still, behind closed doors
I forget which body is mine and which is yours
My hands are wrapped all around you body
And I am touching your skin so soft
We just lay on the couch leaving the TV off
We have no music, no movies and no entertainment
We are just lying still, drinking up each other’s presence

All Alone

He’s so alone in this world
No mother to talk too
No brother to stand beside
So abandoned in this country, on his motorcycle he rides
Maybe some day he will ride to another town
Maybe he will even see his lost sisters
Are they married?
Do they have kids?
Are they divorced?
It has been over ten years since he heard his sisters’ voice.

He’s so alone in this world
No woman to talk too
No friend to fight beside
So lost in the city, in its streets he does stride
But walking the streets, he knows all their names
He gets only blank looks from empty souls
And he can give them back only the same

He is so alone in this world
No daughter to talk too
No son to be beside
So lonely in this house, only he abides
His future is the graveyard
A single priest by his bed, for his last rites
So despair, he carries so much pain
His work goes unnoticed
And his charity is unseen
Almost his whole life, he had only me
I paid for it to be written on his headstone
That, “This poor guy was all alone.”

Father’s Day with no Dad

A God dims his glow
And his magic stops it’s flow
A gentle man with peaceful heart
My dad had pains, he could not stop
The pressure built that made him suffer
He was not a fighter but a lover
He was not fit for the circumstance
Coerced upon him by ugly chance
My dad, I remember and still cry for
I still don’t understand this fucking world
I try to go back when I had a place
I was at home just seeing his face
Destiny is calling but it’s all different now.
The days are good but lost their intent somehow.
I remember my dad and
I still don’t know why he had to go.
And why the Gods dimmed his glow.

Hollow

Your empathy is not felt
And your sympathy is hollow
You have come and gone
And now the hour is desperate
You do not come by or call
Sitting there in your chair
You say you are sorry
But your sympathy is hollow

It is so easy to be sorry
So easy to let it all be on me
And not have to do with you
It is my problem, my situation
And you don’t feel responsibility
We are not a team,
We are not friends or neighbors
Just two people that pass each other
But do not share one another

Your sympathy is hollow
Because you say you understand
But you will not stand to help
You do not lift a finger
You just give idle words
And walk away
Like I am not you or you not me
But the truth is we are one and
You turn your back on me
Is turning your back on you.

Krispy Dream

Oh creator of the Krispy Krème
How did you make such a sweet dream?
I figured it was time for me to eat
Such a creation so delicious and neat.
I called my mom and told her to come
But I asked one little thing before she left home.
Do you know what it was?
Can you guess my great scheme?
I asked her to bring a bit of the sweet dream.
She got off the plane after a long flight.
I told her I had not eaten since the last night.
Then out of her carry on
In to my sweaty palms
Came a bag of six sweetened golden charms
I admit they were not fresh, they were not hot
The icing was melted and their bodies were shot.
They were really in fact a day and a half old
But I don’t have to say, they unleashed pleasure untold.
I ate them all very quickly with incredible speed.
I thought about giving one a way as a good deed.
But I could not resist, I ate them all so fast
And at the end I had to go and take a long nap.
But it in my rest I had a great dream
About a little golden circle and the pleasure it brings

Anything....Really?

Saw a poor man walking down the street.
The man looked hungry and looked beat.
But driving thirty five he blurs by.
Is it really my duty to stop and help that pitiful sight?
Didn't he get himself in that situation?
And no one told me to help him.
But in the book there is a message of love.
Wasn't there a message from the son?
Do anything for anyone.

But you know sometimes it sure feels like my spirit is tired and beat.
And if God happens to pass by my street.
It sure seems like he takes a minute to help me.
Sometimes even does miraculous things.
and when God's flying a way
A message deep down in the heart is
Just like anything was just done for you
Do anything for anyone for true loves sake.

It has to be that the son stops for people on the street
It has to be because that man on the street,
Spiritually is really me
My long days have me confused and hurt
and the spirit comes to comfort
The spirit does anything for anyone

And so tomorrow when the homeless man blurs by
It is my turn to turn around and say hi
Talk to him and make sure on the cold winters day
At least this one homeless man has a warm place to stay
And at that moment two blessings take place
One for the homeless man and one is in my heart
The whole thing happens by God's grace
Blessed is the message of the son
Anything for anyone

Old Friend

Walks right up next to me
Starts talking about how things use to be
We are just two strangers, talking for the first time
And as we trade words, things just seem to become all fine
Then passing through my mind, there is a trace and a snap
And it is realized who this is
It is my old friend from the past
There is a new face on my old friend
He has died and been born again

Back together again we talk and play
Together again, it is a splendid day
We have so much to learn and teach
Lessons forgotton but yet still within reach
We help make each others lives better
Life after life we help each other
Reunited with my old friend in a new face
Excited to just wake up, day after day